Pineapple Slices

Grill them, flambe them, toast them with cheese - they taste good.

Okay, that satisfied my randomness today and I'll admit it was somewhat half-hearted.

I'm still so tired. And so unorganized. And disappointed by life. And still procrasinating. And still insecure. And still using fragments.



Okay, don't toast them with cheese. I tried that with a banana once and it was putrid.

This Could Be Our Day

this could be our day
to give ourselves away
for something beautiful

Texts From A Shopping Trip

Lacking Jak on my recent shopping endeavour, I began to text her.

"Do you think cravats are only for men?"
"Yes, 'cause dresses are only for GIRLS."

"What do you think about fushia-colored sweaters? How do they make you feel?" "Uh, not too good. You?"

"Sparkly gold minidress?" "No."

"Ooh, sparkly tight pants!" "Yay! What size?" "2." "Hmm, no nvm."

"If I were a 14, I'd fit into so many more of these pants." _no reply_

"Note to self(sent to PJ): buy no more pants that are attracted to cat hairs."

"It's the Eddie Bauer vashon fit!" "Dear, dear! Whata ta do?"

"Clown pants with pleats?" "No, prob not."

"Pink and purple ruffled buttondown?" "Sure."

I would like to officially thank my very charming and talented and attractive older sister for bearing with me as I try to get over my texting frenzy. Also props to PJ, who cheerfully helps out as well.

Truth Revealed

Oh, by the way, Ramon is a creeper. Saw that one coming. O_o

Purple Alive

Everybody look about the room and select something purple. It doesn't have to be moveable. Now, hold that thought.

Okay, so I called Nordstrom's Rack and this utter idiot was in the shoe department. I say that mostly because he made me feel incredibly dumb. An associate in the shoe department should never make anyone calling on the phone feel dumb. He paused for long moments of time, inferred that I had no idea what was going on, repeatedly told me things I'd already said I knew and generally made a boor of himself. He gave me a headache. I was dangerously close to calling back to complain to his management. I resolved to never be like that. People calling the Kohls' shoe department while I'm working will be welcomed, helped, thanked and generally treated like intelligent people.

My brother made me a bubble tea. Mmhmm, honeydew melon. It's so good.

I'm texting this guy named Ramon. He started texting my phone as soon as I got it. He can't spell and thought I was his dream-chick Karmella. I soon dispelled that myth and I've been asking him about God. It's a really weird conversation, but I feel that God is in it. I've had the tendancy, in the past, to be like 'oh, a texter/online person, well... must not be real, or I can treat them like they're not real', but this time God really gave me a heart to see that this is a real person and he seems pretty lost, too. Don't worry. I'm not giving him any personal information. ^_^

Oh, the cabin was super fun. Nice and warm and I put on enough sunscreen that I didn't get burned at all, just the slightest tad of a tan. Okay, I have to go get ready for work. Stay well, my friends and look for God in real life.

R<3

ps. Purple combines the stability of blue and the energy of red. Purple is associated with royalty and symbolizes power, nobility, luxury, and ambition. It conveys wealth and extravagance. Purple is associated with wisdom, dignity, independence, creativity, mystery, and magic.

Sleeping In

I've been really tired lately. I've probably slept more than I've been awake these past two days and I'm still somewhat tired. I can't pinpoint why. Either I'm headed into a growing spurt or I'm not properly digesting the stresses of my life.

The picture is from a stop motion video short called Her Morning Elegance about an early morning dream a girl has. I liked it.

Peace be with you, 'cause Jesus gave us his peace. You can pray for me 'cause I'm working tonight.

R <3

Cougar

Yes. I just got a black... polyurethane (I like to call it leather, although that's technically incorrect) trench coat. Garage sales make my life. Paid three bucks for it. It's currectly the most beautiful thing I own. ^_^

Here's a poem I wrote during the sermon yesterday.

look look, he waits like a cougar
look and he will spring upon your soul
ravish your heart, take your eyesight
oh look, he waits, with vigor, power
a strong, lithe love, deep and free
with claws of grace, waiting to leap
oh with all your being, cry to God
for strength to lift your head
...and look

I have a Senior Dinner tonight. I have to think up an outfit.

Alright, people. Take care. Do something today that you'll always be proud of.

R <3

Wah!

The Vicki's coming... - the Vicki and Bryan are here! Wow... first time meeting an online friend. <.< >.>

It's The Smoke That Makes The Salmon Strong

I'm waiting for my coffee to cool. I haven't had a decent coffee in so long, just 'cause I haven't wanted one. It's a lowfat decaf vanilla latte and yes all the words in that title mean something important. I made it up when I got sick of paying 3.20 for a small at Dunn Bros. Just half a cup of skim (or low-fat, in this case) milk heated for a minute in the microwave, then add one spoonful of instant decaf coffee, two capfuls of vanilla extract and three spoonfuls of sugar, stir and fill up the cup the rest of the way with hot water. Super good. Super thrifty. ^_^

Well, by now my coffee is cold, because I got distracted reading fashion blogs. Ah, I hate the snobbery that some people give fashion. My friend Lucie is going to be going to school to be a fashion designer and I know right now that I will absolutely love her stuff. I hope she makes her own line. She has a great attitude of keeping it down-to-earth-but-imaginative and always for God's glory. That's my plug for her.

I hung out with all seniors this weekend. It was our trip away, to celebrate graduating. But as I told Amanda on our early morning canoe trip(freezing cold, btw)that the trip was weird for me in ways, because technically I've graduated high school long ago and will be finishing college in a year or so, hopefully. So it didn't feel like a real celebration for me, just a hang out time. We went to Famous Dave's on the way back in. My first time eating there and I had a great time. I just love the seniors at Bethlehem. They're easy-going and just plain nice. I'm sad that most of them are moving away. No, don't leave me!
I had a salad that I was planning to tell you about - *ahem* - it was the smoked salmon caesar salad and I really like fish. I really, really like fish. Not as much as I like fashion blogs, but it comes in pretty close. The salmon was a perfect compliment to the salad and the amount of caesar dressing they gave me was ridiculous. Sincerely ridiculous. I used about 9/87ths of all they gave me.

Another thing I wanted to tell you. I absolutely love wearing pink. Mary has completely convinced me. I'm a Summer and will now accept it joyfully. ...(read the book Color Me Beautiful or google it, if you're confused. I don't have time to explain it all now. Actually, maybe I do. Man, I wish someone would come on chat and distract me. The length of this blog post is beginning to disturb me.) Well, the main idea is that everyone has a different coloring and each coloring is assigned a season and certain colors look better on some seasons.

Oh and note on last post; the pictures are not precise. They're merely the closest I could find.

Yeah. So. Any exciting news? Well, not really. I'm waiting for Bre from work to call me. She's amazing. ^_^ I love my coworkers. I'm excited to possibly be going to Mary's cabin next weekend. I'm thinking about thinking about studying my sunday school curiculum for tomorrow morning and I have to pick out an outfit. I've been into comfort lately. I should go shopping... My little sister makes the best cinnamon rolls. Oh. I could eat an entire panful. They're huge and soft and mildly sweet with this amazing butter sugar cinnamon glaze. The thought gives me shivers. The sad thing is she only made a single recipe. That will not last long around our house.

I pray God will bless your week, whether you're doing finals, preparing for open houses, working or just chillin'.

R <3333

ps. Eat Soup
pps. I've decided the pinky hold is the cutest form of affection.

Indulge Me

I'm a writer. While editing my latest story, I decided to find pictures and people who look similiar to my characters. These two might possibly be the oddest combination of celebrity types, but you must keep in mind that it's the look that I'm trying to capture, not necessary the history of either celebrity.

First is Amanda B, my main character.


For those of you who have read it, this is what her hair looked like towards the end.

And he is the closest I could come to someone resembling Sierra Joe Crayola.



This is a lot of what he looks like. The hair is almost perfect, although I'll debate the eyebrows and Sierra definitely doesn't do the whole I'm-too-sexy-for-my-shirt thing. =/

So yeah, story's in editing and perhaps when I'm finished, it will be ready for public reading. Email me. I'll see what I can do. ^_^

Bought Stuff Today

Beautiful Sarai and I went garage-sale shopping this afternoon and... she didn't get anything. What's that about? However, my truckload of treasures included;

1) a pair of black shoes
2) a pair of brown shoes with SQUARE toes. oddness, you say. indeed, but uber-squishy, plus purple flowers embroidered on those self-same toes.
3) a shirt, pink, vintage, random, everything I could ever want in a shirt (besides the long sleeves)
4) a scarf - pink and white, gauzy and I think I just love it
5) another scarf - purple and green and just about as floaty as the other
6) earrings which absolutely delight my heart, they're just about twice as long as my hair! green, gold and brown beads, super light!

There's one unfortunate thing about myself that I'm becoming quite anxious about lately. I'm quite the one to buy shoes that I don't like or don't fit. It's most distressing... I don't like the black pair I got today or a weird glammed-up sandal I got the day before. Maybe it's a sign that I should stop shoe-shopping. Oh tragic day. I think I'll go cry a bit in my tuna as I prepare my supper...

Dragonflies

let's be dragonflies
just tonight
in the dark
all tonight
let's be dragonflies
with strong wings
wide dark eyes
burning speed
let's be dragonflies
clear throughout
dreaming deep
live rebirth
let's be dragonflies
close to change
wings in Wind
immortal
let's be dragonflies
just tonight
in the dark
all tonight

Give Us Eyes

We're blind. All of us. We can't see any truth, we can't know anything good if God doesn't conquer our dead hearts and draw us in. If we do see, we need to remember that we can't convert anyone, even if we use all the right words. God has to open their eyes and blind them with the glory of his love.

A Short Ridiculous Expose

Once upon a time, a Girl lived and as she lived, she was driven by a singular Urge. It was to buy Shoes. Once the shoes were bought and brought back home, they were Worn, so as to be duly admired. They were Worn in strange Places, such as school doorways (ones with locked doors) and on ledges of varying heights. Sometimes, when she was tired of wearing them, she'd just sit in the sun with them, Enjoying them. All in all, she was Cheerful.

Is Prayer a Duty?

"You can call it that. It’s a duty the way it’s the duty of a scuba diver to put on his air tank before he goes underwater. It’s a duty the way pilots listen to air traffic controllers. It’s a duty the way soldiers in combat clean their rifles and load their guns. It’s a duty the way hungry people eat food. It’s a duty the way thirsty people drink water. It’s a duty the way a deaf man puts in his hearing aid. It’s a duty the way a diabetic takes his insulin. It’s a duty the way Pooh Bear looks for honey. It’s a duty the way pirates look for gold." ~Pastor John

I've been thinking about... lots of things lately. Too many things. I don't think they're coming out right now. I feel stifled by myself and my heritage right now, like I grew up in a strait-jacket. I have to go to work. I have friends that I want to help. I'm avoiding things that I should do - namely graduation plans (blech) and college work. I'm tired, too. I stayed up last night watching Anne of Green Gables, The Continuing Story (you know the one, the fake one, all made-up) with Gilbert and Anne going off to war, Green Gables being ruined and restored, burned and then restored again, the expected jealousy triangle between fiancees and Random Other Person, with our happy couple gaining a son at the end. Despite being such a hardened movie critic, I actually really liked it. I'm still surpised at myself. I think Gilbert grew on me and Anne is a really good actress. I just liked it.

Well. I have to go put on my preppy clothes and stress about work some more. What shall I bring for lunch...?

As Bialystoker would say, don't die and don't get kidnapped, if at all possibly.

~R-iey

Black and White Abstract

thick paint brush on white walls
black streaks down to hardwood
an angry frenzy, release of aggression
so waiting for this, unwilling to stop

black on black
it's just a
repeater
black on black
she's just a
defeater

like a grouch worm
on gray sidewalk, on a rainy day.
crawling, crawling... don't watch it
it wants to be let alone

white on white
let's be zen
peaceful fight
white on white
I'll go alone
just tonight

Beyond Cough Drops

Cough drops are a pitiful force against the advancement of my dreadful cough. I've brought out the artillery. Honey-lemon syrup, tea, breathing steam from hot water and even salt on the back of the tongue (never tried that before, and it works!).

Four in the morning and I was sure that Jak was just as awakened by my coughing as I was... and it has to be more annoying when it's not coming from inside your own head, and you can't know when it's coming and worst of all, you have no way of stopping it - except for irritably demanding that your sister leave the room - thank you, Jak, for not making me leave, but letting me figure out on my own that I was annoying. I love you! ^_^

Don't take your siblings for granted. If you are, imagine a day being an only child, or just a day without that particular brother, or a meal without seeing that sister. I feel tragically bad, just thinking about it. I'm so often annoyed by one of my brothers that I've stopped seeing the good things that he does and when I turn to him, he can be pretty much sure that I'm bugged by something he's doing or done. I'm going to practice being more thankful for him.

I've felt even more strongly how important family is lately. My oldest brother moved out recently and... yeah, it's a weird feeling seeing him acting a bit like a stranger in this house when he comes over. He's still who he's always been, but he's moving on and I'm so glad he is. He's becoming more of the man God wants him to be, but I almost feel like a mom, in that he's growing up... and he's not with us anymore. I'm going to cry.

Even more, my little sisters; I remember the age they're at and it seems like they're skidding past what took me forever. You know how long days used to seem when you were seven? And how waiting a week for vacation was an achingly long process? It's all speeding up and I feel like, just by not intentionally being there, I'm missing out on their growing-up years.

Okay. I'm done. Let's all go to heaven, okay? Where we can be eternally young and never have to lose people, never have to feel like we're missing anything, or doing something wrong, and never have to be sick.

R <3