Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Tribute To Nearness

This is my tribute, my thanksgiving song for a God who is wise, wonderful and close. I am an unskilled conductor who cannot line up words and make them sing. So I tell you what happens, movement and language to try to frame in stories my incredible Savior. Do you see? I hope you do.

This morning, I wrote, I told Mum and Daddio that I feel depressed. It's true. My energy is sapped away just by the most basic living and emotions. Please Father, come hold me, shush my frantic mind and give me peace which passes all understanding.

Biking to work, I started crying. So many things overwhelmed me that I didn't even worry that my tears would freeze in the icy wind. I can't do this alone. I can't go to work. I can't be me. I can't function today. Please God, please come and be near. Be near, like stand right next to me - or better yet behind me because I'm falling. I've fallen. I need you. 

I picked a little diamond chip of a verse and wrapped my soul around it - "But for me it is good to be near God; I have made the Lord GOD my refuge that I may tell of all your works."*

Somehow, a miracle given to a thirsty daughter, I received hope. It was hope that sustained my day, that let me smile and even laugh and keep doing the things I needed to do, even bringing a surprise oasis of joy.
Later, I sang a song and my soul dwelt amazed on this line. It was truth, from a place I'd known.

He sees each tear that falls
and hears me when I call

That morning, I came tumbling, sobbing, wretched, complicated, dragging remnants of rebellion and unbelief, unable to cope. I found a Father, calling me his own, never leaving me alone. He is near. Do you see? Oh, I hope you do.



  1. I'm praying friend!! This is such an amazing example of the hope that God gives just when you need it the most. What an encouragement you are!

    Your sis in Christ,

  2. smiles...its like grover on sesame street teaching us near and far.......oh he is near...

  3. i read the first part of this post and a tears came to my eyes!! i hope good helps you through every thing your going through.
    i listen to those songs and they really helped me with things im going through so i just want to say thank you !!! and i really enjoy reading your blog!!

  4. oh and i really love that first picture!! you have be blessed with a great talent!!!!

  5. I can totally relate. I've been up and down, up and down, over and over for two years battling depression. I don't know if you have this problem, but I'm praying for you. :) So glad God is seeing you through!

  6. Oh you wonderful girl. He is.

    You are stunning in that photo.

  7. good stuff girl. today has been rough for me as well. it's such a comfort knowing that God is on our side.

    i hope today was better.


  8. I've been there so often! Praying praying praying for you girlie. Skype soon please?

  9. I've been there so often. Praying for you girie! skype soon please?